It's been a looooooooooooooooooooong time since I've update my blog,so this post gonna be a long long post! It's including Christmas and New Year.
It's december time~In this month except christmas and New year celebration,what else we can do?Yup,but I both also don't have..as my Dear went back to her own house..so some of you maybe curious why she don't celebrate with me,and yes the answer is here,she went back home is my idea ^_^.. It's been almost 2 week + she didn't go home,usually she went to home each week of a month..but then she busy outing with me and her exam,so she didn't even get a properly rest in december,we went outing before this decision made,my dear said 1 thing while we waiting the train..she say..
"Dear..I'm so miss home..don't know christmas want to go home or not.."
"Dear..I'm so miss home..don't know christmas want to go home or not.."
and my mood seriously went down..she said she will celebrate with me,but then..she only wish to go home..yet i plan all the activities and waiting the day come..my head all blank and just can keep quiet..she said to me.."Don't worry dear..I said I will celebrate with you right?no need think too much~ I'm just miss home,homesick only.." and I just smile..we walk walk walk..that enviroment so noisy buy between us..is so cold..and silence..and then when we reach a gift shop..I decided to tell her to go home..but I don't know how to tell her..so I sms her,yeah it sounds so stupid to send her sms than talk to her face to face..but I don't know how to face her or give her what kind of reaction..
The content is about..(I roughly remember though)
"Darling,this december 25th you go home alright?..since you so long didn't stay at home and rest..you sure miss home very much..eventhough you promised me..nevermind..every year I also celebrate alone..I get used to it though..say that I'm happy sure lie you one..but I've decided to let you go home,and thank you for giving a little hope of happiness..I love you! Muacks! <3"
At that time her phone is kept in my pocket,because she ask me to hold it,then her phone ring,i close it,untill we finish shopping in the gift shop,she ask for the phone..and then I gave her..so we chat the same thing when she saw the message..we discuss..she ask me is it alright to do so..I keep say yes I'm fine..and she don't know that I 've planned all the activities..If i told her this point..she wont go home..even she stay and celebrate with me..I bet she still not as happy as I think though..so Thats how we decided..and Christmas Eve and Christmas..I am..all alone..my sis went back to hometown..so in the house..I'm all alone..Hopelessly..and wish someone to celebrate with me..exchange gift..Happy Belated Merry Christmas everyone! :) I bet you all enjoy with you love one! That's all for my Christmas!
*~New Year Eve~*
It's new year eve! Yes the same question! Why she didn't celebrate with me?because..she went back to home celebrate christmas right?and then she stay at home until new year of course! But then we got a little arguement..Can say that It's all happen because of my loneliness..because I lonely so I jealous other people celebrate..because I can't celebrate i wish somebody to accompany me..and then got some private matter happen too on the day..It's bout my family..I so stress and frustrate so wish that my dear would be there for me..but then she celebrating with family..I shouldn't spoil her mood..but yes I did it..I feel like kinda bad for her..my stress I give it to her..as her boyfriend,I really don't know how to say this,know where the problem is then change it from the problem by experience..so in the end,I celebrate alone also..sitting at home..and eat pizza..thats all :) I can say that...whole december..happiness only reach 10th..and those other days so on..I'm really really so upset..Even new year..not really nice starting..wish to be better person in future..
Happy New Year everyone! May you have a prosper year! Cheers :)
